My abecedarian attempt at educatin you.

Today we will start out with "A" and work ourselves through the letter "D"

The letter A is pronounced "aye". It is the only single letter I have ever known used to make up a full sentence.

It can be used to show a level of respect, offer a reply and end any further conversation in one single shot. Judge asks "Do you plead guilty to speeding?" I reply "A". Guy in a bar asks "You take me for a fool?" I reply "A". Blonde in a tight dress asks "You like?" I reply "A"

Now comes the letter "B". It is rumored that William Shakespeare once wrote one of his most famous lines based simply on the letter B. On returning from the pub half sloshed and unable to remember his hotel room number he fumbled with his keys in all three doors in the hallway, causing a ruckus he woke several people and one gentleman asked him kindly. "What in hell do you think you're doing out in the hall this time of the night?" He simply grinned and asked "2-B or not 2-B? That is the question that I ask of thee." It turned out to be 2-C far down on the left but upon waking he remembered it with a grin and wrote about it.

The letter C is unique in that Americans and the British people use this letter only to annoy other people. It owns no real sound of it's own and it's a real pain in the ass to use in writing but it does confuse others with it's many uses. It can be pronounced like the letter Q, S, the sounds shh, ck (or just K) and even be used silent like a waste of ink on paper.

D is a better letter. No arguing it's sound and my favorite thing about the letter D is it can be added onto so many other words to create a new word when playing Scrabble or Literati and you can build off it easily to create another word for a double play. I also use it often when describing dumbasses, dim-whits, dorks, druids, dill-bowls, danks, dweebs, ding-dongs, Democrats, dorks, dis-contentious dis-concerned dramatic dowel kissin doughnut spittin moronic delusive ding-dongs and other things.

I hope you have enjoyed this lesson and tomorrow we might get to study E, F, G & H together...

Word of the Day for Wednesday, September 2, 2009

abecedarian \ay-bee-see-DAIR-ee-uhn\, noun:

1. One who is learning the alphabet; hence, a beginner.
2. One engaged in teaching the alphabet. <--- Me dummy.
3. Pertaining to the letters of the alphabet.
4. Arranged alphabetically.
5. Rudimentary; elementary.

Columba's poem is fittingly 'abecedarian', each stanza starts with a subsequent letter of the alphabet -- a harbinger of the Scottish appetite for cataloguing, and delight in craft.
-- WN Herbert, "A rhyme and a prayer", Scotland on Sunday, December 10, 2000

While much of the work resembled abecedarian attempts of a novice choreographer, "Duet," sensitively danced by Jennifer A. Cooper and William Petroni, is surprisingly sophisticated in its careful deployment of formal thematic manipulations in the service of emotional expression.
-- Lisa Jo Sagolla, "Open 24 Hours Dance Company", Back Stage, September 1, 1998

The approach may seem abecedarian today, but his was among the first endeavors of the sort.
-- Jennifer Liese, "May 1973", ArtForum, May 2003

Abecedarian derives from Latin abecedarius, from the first four letters of the alphabet. <--- those would be A,B,C & D.